The Teachings of Dr. Rao

That sounds nice. It’s a powerful vision. But why is it so relevant now? 

There’s no such thing as a 40-hour professional work week anymore. Twenty years ago – even 10 years ago – you could dislike what you did and still have enough time to be fulfilled outside of your job. Today, with e-mail and cell phones and Blackberries and PDAs, you’re never away from work. With the amount of time an average executive puts in now, if she doesn’t find fulfillment in her job, she’s living in New Age Corporate Hell. That isn’t a nice place to live.

O.K., I can understand why your program appeals to harried executives. But why should companies care if their people are “fulfilled”? You can’t measure it. 

The same reason companies keep hiring you to coach their senior people! They become far more effective at what they do. Executives don’t burn out and leave when they feel deep satisfaction. They don’t create the human detritus that disgruntled managers do.

And society is better off as well? 

You bet! Actually the link is much more direct. I have exercises that lead participants to discover for themselves that their deepest fulfillment comes when what they’re doing is of benefit to larger society in some way. This really knocks some for a loop – especially those schooled in the “take no prisoners” approach. But they don’t argue because, this isn’t something that I tell them. This is something that I let them discover on their own.

Why does your course have its own alumni association? 

Many of our alumni feel that their lives have been changed completely. Practically everyone feels that they got something of great value. The alumni association is a great way for them to meet others who have been through a similar experience and to be “plugged into” a highly supportive community.

What advice would you give someone who hasn’t read your book and can’t take your course? Give me three things such a person can do to improve his or her life. 

Fine. Here’s the first: We all define our reality and then proceed to experience it. But most of us don’t realize we’re doing it. We think that reality is given to us, as opposed to something we had a hand in creating. Once we understand this, we can define and live in a different reality that’s far better.

That’s too abstract. Explain it with an example. 

You’re driving on a highway and get rudely – even dangerously – cut off by someone who weaves in and out. Your natural reaction is to give him the finger and stew in anger. See how this makes you feel.

Now imagine that the erratic driver is rushing to get to the hospital because he has received news that his son has been in an accident and is critically ill. See how the waves of sympathy gush out. You don’t know if he’s inconsiderate or responding to an emergency, but you do have the choice of living in one of those spaces. Why not pick one that leaves you feeling uplifted and compassionate rather than angry and frustrated?

O.K. What’s the next? 

Think of an altercation you had with your boss or spouse or any person in your life with whom you have an ongoing relationship. What were you thinking about this person in the 24- to 48-hour period immediately preceding the argument? Odds are pretty good that you were thinking quite negatively. It’s unlikely that you were a completely innocent, aggrieved party. You had a hidden hand in creating that unpleasantness.